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Updated: Nov 7, 2019

As I have been processing the break up, it's been hard to not think about all the "could have's" including all of the things we never got around to. Things I really wish we had experienced together. And although I know that that is no longer a possibility, I thought writing them down would be helpful. Maybe it'll get me to stop playing all these possibilities in my head- maybe not. But potentially, I'll make this into a piece in the future...

- You never got to go visit mi ranchito. Patzimaro, Michoacán. I wish I could have shown you my families hometown. Taken you to listen to la banda en el quiosco. Para que conocieras las fiestas traditionales. Para sentarnos en la garrita... gahh I'll stop right there before I get all chillona.

- Nunca estrenamos the picnic basket I had bought. I envisioned us having a cute, romantic lil picnic at the beach in Malibu I wanted to take you to.

- No fuimos a un baile juntas. I wanted to go listen to live banda and dance the night away. Queering up Pico Rivera...

- I wish we could have gone camping... especialmente con tus amigas como habiamos querido.

- We never got to take dance classes together. De banda, merengue, salsa, bachata... To strengthen our skills and even choreograph routines together hehe.

- Fully settling in, decorating our room, our housewarming party

- Countless things we wanted to see and do in LA

- An intentional trip to show you around Napa, where I grew up... Take you wine tasting.

- Our cute ass queer vaquerx couple photoshoot

Okay, I'll come back to this later... It's surfacing way too much for me right now.

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